This is like I'm not making connections, this is like I'm dying

My days are work and Ashes To Ashes series one. Waiting for mum and Sara to come home with food. Then I'm going to bed again (I have already fallen asleep once).


End of summer leave

Tomorrow is my first day of work for this summer. So for the upcoming seven weeks I'll probably won't be blogging much. Just so you know. I start at 7.00 in the morning and get off at 14.30. Tomorrow I'm also going to Lund after work, to see Cicci. Probably going to need the cheering up after my first day. Going to be so tired.

Still not sure what to do about my project. I'm very happy about my first three pictures, but inspiration is fading. To just have three feels a bit little. Maybe I should just do four? Or leave it at three? The holy trinity and all that. I'll have to give it some more thought. Gonna tell you what it's all about as well, someday soon.

Gonna read some now and then go to bed early (or earlIER, really).


His hand will be against everyone and everyone’s hand against him

This serious dressing up thing I've got going for this project is so much fun. To look like a completely different person in every picture. If you can figure out who I am supposed to be today (or who I was yesterday and the day before, for that matter) you will earn my unmost respect and a virtual cookie.

I've done three pictures now. There's still one more person I want to do, but I can't have four pictures. I simply can't. Four is my unlucky number. It has to be s number that can be devided by three (yes, I am superstitious). I just don't know which two to have for the remaining two yet...

Anyway, this project is going to kick my last ones ass.


Comment reply

Well, yeah, but no. Not really. They're the kind you braid in. I needed to fake black long hair for my picture, and my amount of black real hair extensions is very limited and wasn't enough to to make the whole hair. So I put the real hair on the top of my head and put the dreads on a hairband in the back to make it seem longer. I think you'll understand when you see the picture!

But I do indeed own braid-in-dreads in plenty of colours. Used to wear it every now and then before.

This is from late 2009 and I think that was the last time I had it. Wanted to get it again a couple of weeks ago, but I couldn't afford to buy new ones that match my hair.


He can't rewrite the agro of my furied heart

Teaser numero 2. I originally intended for this to be a "oneshot", but the picture from yesterday turned out so good and so much like the pictures from untitled so I just can't help myself. This is going to be untitled II. It's a little darker, a slightly different theme and less pictures. Going to tell you more about the theme when I've done more pictures.

Am a bit annoyed about the one I just did. I mean it's lovely, really. But there's just no shadows in the face. I wouldn't have minded that much if it weren't for the amazing shadowing on yesterday's picture. That one is much much better than today's. They just don't go alongside each other because today's look so flat opposed to yesterday's. Going to work on it some more now to see what I can do...

Update: Ignore my shadow rant above, I managed to fake it.


We are not just art for Michelangelo to carve

A teaser for my latest shoot. Some clues are that there's a lot of lace and a bit of blood. I've done a lot of research for this one, but it won't show. I just thought I should know some background before I do an interpretation of something.



My sister's having a Midsummer Eve party and I'm joining them for dinner before. I found a light pink dress yesterday, and I slept with curlers in my hair to see if I could get a "Alex Drake, series 1"-hairstyle. And I could.

Gonna stop being borning and go across the yard now, bye!



I'm off to do some errands. Wearing my new heels from Topshop today. My feet are probably going to die.

Been looking for a baby pink dress for the past week, without success. Rooting for finding one today to wear on Midsummer Eve.


In Portraits II


Trains and busses

Today I and Sara traveled 1h45min to buy a pillow. Then I traveled another hour to get to a shopping center. There we met Cicci and I bought a pair of heels on Topshop. Then I traveled about an hour altogether to get home. Can't you tell I have great priorities? But that's what you get when you travel all over the county for free.


Run with the fury of a saint in her eyes


Vote for my dress!

Mina designade klänning på NELLY.COM
Mina designade klänning på NELLY.COM

Help me win, vote for my dress here!


In Portraits

I am really sorry about the lack of update for the past couple of days. But you know how it is. Sometimes there's just really nothing to tell. My life has just been sleeping, eating, cleaning and wishing I could go abroad. I start work on tuesday next week, so I won't be going anywhere anytime soon.

Been practising straight on, almost close-up self portraits. I've got a shoot in mind that I really want for it to turn out amazing, but it will be a portrait like this, and close-ups is not my strongest suit. This is one of maybe 10 to 15 shots, and it was the only one I felt worth bothering with. Usually I have about 30-40%, that I rate as workable in Adobe Bridge (workable means that it gets a random amount of stars, so it shows when I filter the unrated ones out). But then again, portraits like this is very fun to edit, because there's good quality in the details, which gives you more options in how to work it. Smoothing skin, colour roots and other beauty-editing is also much easier.

Probably going to do some more practising before I dare putting my skills to the test. Need to prepare the outfit as well, when I find the time. Hopefully someday soon. It'd be nice to have it done before I start work. Probably going to do something about my roots before as well. Because even though it's easy as pie to "colour" them in photoshop, I always rather not. The less beauty-editing I have to do, the better I feel about myself... Though I don't actually do as much as some people like to think, most of the time.



Pretty In Pink was on TV last night and has left me very happy about my very orange hair. To bad I've got very little light pink clothes to (miss-)match it with. Can't even understand how I can NOT have light pink clothes? Probably because when I was blonde preferably I only dressed in dark colours... Anyway, the film also left me with a need to wear hats. Got my mum's old brown one today. Haven't worn it in ages (two blogs ago!). Before I cut my hair "short" and when I still had my fringe... God, looking at those old picture's it feels so unreal that I once looked like that... Seems like I'm going back to that though, since I'm using a lot of the stuff I got then, now. I'm so nostalgic lately (if you can be nostaligic about something that was only one-two years ago...). But I am most certainly not going blonde with fringe again anytime soon. More likely to go darker, if anything.

And I'm gaving serious tattoo-cravings.

Going to a family dinner (or barbeque if you like) in a while. I wonder if it's going to be cold tonight. If I should wear a jacket or just a shirt. Or both... It's kinda cloudy. And I'm very easily cold (poor blood circulation). Ah well, I'll see what the other's are wearing and then I'll take that, times five...


Whatever makes you...

Managed to swap clothes three times today. Because first I was going out, then I wasn't, but then I was again. Anyway I'm home now and I managed to shop some, even if I really shouldn't have. It's just that whenever I really shouldn't, I find things I've been looking for on sale. It always happens. But ah well. It makes me happy.

Think it's going to rain tonight. I'm going to watch some Spooks and hopefully read a lot.


I wish that I could dance on single prayer

I wish I could be strong without permission.


la liste

Title is because I know Moe likes it when I write in French! Unfortunatly the whole post won't be in it... This was just because I have no pictures today, but I wanted to update anyway. Et vous savez combien j'aime mes listes!

Name: Malin.
Piercings: Not apart from my ears, but that doesn't really count.
Tattoos: Two. Born This Way heart on my arm and Deathly Hallows triangle in my neck.
Length: 159 cm.
Shoe size: 36 or 37 depending on the shoe's model...
Hair colour: Red, sort of.
Freckles: No, I don't think so.
Motto: "Success is the best revenge", among other things.
In love? No.
Do you wish you lived somewhere else? Yes.
Do you consider yourself good-looking? Ah, this again. Yes, as a atter of fact, I do.
What shampoo do you use? Whatever my mum bought when she was shopping. But if I could choose I like L'oreal Elvive Colour Protect.
What are you afraid of? To not have accomplished something in life. And to always be alone.
Do you like roller-coasters? I do, but not of they have loops.

Movie you rented? I generally don't watch movies, so I don't rent them either.
Movie you bought? Still don't watch movies, but the last DVD I bought was Ashes To Ashes series 3.
Song you heard? Black Jesus+Amen Fashion by Lady Gaga.
Song you downloaded? Can't remember.
Person you called? My grandmother.
Person who called you? My grandmother, haha.
TV-program you watched? Spooks.

Song: Right now: Bloody Mary by Lady Gaga.
Thing to do: Take a really good picture, watch a really good TV-show and sleep.
Sport: Have to be taekwondo then. Don't really like sports, though.
Clothes: I have a soft spot for white lace dresses. And shoes in general. Very bad for my wallet.
Movie: Sucker Punch, The Martix trilogy, Inception.
Car: Red Audi Quattro (if you know your Ashes, you know why).
TV-show: Ashes To Ashes and Doctor Who.

Have you ever…
Cried over a boy? No.
Cried over a girl? Yes.
Lied to anyone? Must have done. Can't really think of a time though, to be honest.
Been in a fist fight? With my sister, yes.
Been arrested? No.
Met someone from the Internet IRL? Yes.

Book you read? I read a very long fanfiction a while ago if that counts.
Person who e-mailed you? Apart from newletters, the girl who I bought my leatherjacket from.
Person who sent you a letter? My boss, lol. I think he likes sending letters.
Person who sent you a text message? My dad.
Time you had dinner with your whole family? My WHOLE family... must have been friday or saturday. Always someone who's away...
Thing you bought? Milk, orange juice and chips.
Person you thought of? Keeley Hawes, because I'm watcing Spooks and the only reason why is because she's in it...


I couldn't think of a suitable title

Got this fabulous leatherjacket on the mail today. I won it on an auctioning site a while back. I've been looking for one like this for ages. I wanted a male model and it's such hard work to find in small sizes that are second hand. They're always L or XL or XXXXXXXXXXL or something. But anyway, I got this now, it's XS, and I love it. To warm to wear now though, but in the winter I'll live in it. 600 SEK i payed for it, shipping included. It was my "end-of-school-year-gift" to myself.

Underneath is a jumpsuit from H&M that I'm currently living in. And my fake-McQueen scarf is on my head because my hair is greasy and I'm ashamed to even look at myself when it's like that. Going to wash it tonight so don't worry... (l'information très intéressante, I know). So I'm a pirate for the time being.

Something else très très intéressante is that I'm not sure if I'm going to spend the evening reading or watching Torchwood. Only three episodes left of TW and nothing to read, really, but I really feel like it. Musings of a madwoman, I suppose. Bye.


The time that passes

Over a year ago now. Somtimes I wish I could go back, somtimes I'm glad to have moved on. I just feel a bit wasted where I am right now. I've got so much I want to do and I want to give, but I don't know how to. The world today wasn't made for people like me. I just want to create amazing things, but it costs money that I don't have. I've said before that the only thing I truly fear is to not have done somthing with my life. I know I'm still young, I'm only ninneteen, but everything takes such a long time. Most educations is three years or more. And as much as I would love to be in school forever, I want to be something. Like really, on paper. And I want so much. I don't want to waste my youth doing stuff I don't really want to work with only because I need the money. But that's the way the system works and I should be glad I've got a job at all. But I could really use someone with lots of money to travel with. I want to see more of the world.

Anyway, I'm finished ranting for now. Gonna see if the mail's arrived yet. Bye.


It was a bright and sunny day

A light snow was falling, and the little girl with the tattered shawl had not sold a violet all day. 
At that very moment, a young intern at City Hospital was making an important discovery. The mysterious patient in Room 213 had finally awakened. She moaned softly.
 Could it be that she was the sister of the boy in Kansas who loved the girl with the tattered shawl who was the daughter of the maid who had escaped from the pirates? 
The intern frowned. 
“Stampede!” the foreman shouted, and forty thousand head of cattle thundered down on the tiny camp. The two men rolled on the ground grappling beneath the murderous hooves. A left and a right. A left. Another left and right. An uppercut to the jaw. The fight was over. And so the ranch was saved. 
The young intern sat by himself in one corner of the coffee shop. He had learned about medicine, but more importantly, he had learned something about life.

If you don't know this story you must lead a very sad life! It's from Charlie Brown. My mum taught it to me and my sister when we were kids.

Not much updates because I'm either not doing anything or I'm too busy. Today I was selling old stuff on a flea market and then I was at Marie's, helping her by modelling for her photo project. It was fun!



I'm off to graduation party. 5 inch heels are gonna kill my feet. Happy because I didn't even have to touch my skin in photoshop on this picture and I'm not even wearing foundation (just some concealer).

Over a year since my graduation now. God how my appearance has changed since then. Different haircolour and style, eyebrows (!!!), two tattoos and much much much better skin. And paler, since I haven't tanned ay all this year. Still the very same girl on the inside though. And I still wish I could re-live that day.


Take me back

I miss it so increadibly much. I'm seriously comtemplating that if I'm not accepted into the program I have applied for I'll just take my savings and go to England for like a month or more and just travel around. Maybe even stay for a longer while if I can find a job or something. Just to get away and get some real life experience. But it's not very likely to happen, since getting in to the program is looking very good. But it's nice to have a dreamed up future in case it all goes shit.

AND CICCI! You have to send me the pictures!


Comment reply

This is indeed me. Only I have a lot of makeup on in this picture and have filled in my eyebrows, so I don't look THAT different irl. Someday, I'll post a "without makeup"-picture as well... But it does change my face a bit because I've gone from practically no eyebrows to dark brown. I think it makes my face look more boy-ish actually. But maybe that's just me... Thanks for saying that you find me pretty anyway! ♥

I'm really no good with comment replies and since neither of these are actual questions, I figured since I'm replying to Moe anyway, I'd just do like this and say thank you and I'm glad you like it!



I had a minor makeover today. Firstly I re-dyed my hair. I do that all the time though, because the red colour is only semi-permanent and I can't find a permanent that is the right shade. But today I also did a turquoise dip dye (it's Lady Gaga's fault). I would have wanted it lighter, but since I'm not light blonde anymore and I don't want to bleach, this had to do. It's not as much in reality as it looks like on this picture tough.

And then I also coloured my eye-brows. I was sick of them being so light that you could hardly see them. When I, at the dinner table a couple of days ago, said that I didn't know what to do about them, my dad said "but you keep them shaved off completely, right?". I was like "They're not shaved off..." They're like that naturally. And I thought it looked a bit weird now that I have darker hair. So I bought colouring a couple of days ago and tried it today. My family says it makes my eyes look different. I like it, it definitly goes better with the hair.

Red hair colour is Directions Flame on copper blonde base, dip dye is Stargazer Tropical Green mixed with a tiny bit of Stargazer Coral Blue and some conditioner. Lipstick is MAC Cyber and Swimsuit is from H&M.


Day 30

What do you imagine your life like at age fifty?

Nr. 9 from untitled (cropped).

How do I imagine my life 30 years from now? The basics really. A family of my own, a nice house and a job that I love. The only thing I really want is to feel that I have accomplished something. Just as much as I want someone to make me happy I want to have made myself happy. And if everything goes like I have it planned in my head, then I'm going to be a very happy person at the age of fifty.


5 inches of love

My favourites and my highest. Still trying to get used to walking in them. From and actually one of my least expensive pairs, since I got them on about a 45% discount!


Day 29

Do you wish for anything at 11:11? If so, what do you wish for? Has anything ever come true?

I do, and I've been wishing for the same thing every time for the past year. I'm not going to tell you though. It's one of those secrets I wouldn't share with anyone. I guess you could say it has part come true though, but not in the way I originally wished.


Day 28

If you could choose to live forever, would you? Why or why not?

Honestly, yes. Yes I would. Because one thing I am terribly afraid of is life being to short. To not have enough time. In all the fantasy worlds in my head I am always imortal. I have always been. It's the one constant thing. I always have eternity. As painful as it must be to never die, if I was given the choice today, I would without a doubt choose to live forever.

(picture unrelated)


Where I live: Interior

Yeah, so it's still kind of a mess here. Especially the living room (first picture). Got curtains that I'm going to put up in the big window (the one you can see in the exterior post) and I'm going to get a couch, I think. And some other stuff. I think I've said this before. Going to print some more Gaga-magazine covers for the kitchen as well. I think I'm all done with the bedroom though. I painted the doors and the shoe-shelf white and bought white racks for my clothes so it feels a bit like I'm sleeping in a big bright closet!


Day 27

Which do you prefer: films or television? Why?

Television obviously. Because there is no Doctor Who och Ashes To Ashes film.

And the latest episode of DW was just AASDSAFHDVHVBJSBDFJV!!!!!11!!!1111!!!!oneone (le Doctor/River-ship!)


Where I live: Exterior

Now, I know it's rather confusing for people who have never been to my house to understand when I try to explain how I live and to where I have moved. So here's a little two or three part guide to what it looks like. To start I should say that even tough I usually say I live in Malmö, I don't. I live just outside in a sort of village. It takes fifteen/twenty minutes to get from here to central Malmö by car and between 35 (if you've planned well and are lucky) and 60 minutes by bus, depending on where you're going (but only because the bus route that goes to here sucks and takes insane detours).

This is the house where I have lived for the past eleven/twelve years of my life. I moved here with my family when I was eight. We used to live in a flat in central Malmö.

Same house from inside our garden.

The house where I live now, on the top floor. It's on the other side of the garden. Belongs to my parents and it used to be sort of a shop.

My house viewed from the street. I never use that door. On the top floor is my kitchen window.


Day 26

Choose two: mentally stable, intelligent, attractive. Explain why you chose those two.

(Alex Drake, a person who is as far from mentally stable as you can possibly be.)

Intelligent and attractive. Mostly because I don't believe that there is such a thing as being mentally stable. Awful bore one must be for that... I am most certainly not mentally stable. What is it even? How the hell are you mentally stable? This is a ridiculous question.


Day 25

Would you rather date someone plain with an amazing personality or someone beautiful with a plain personality?

They would bloody NEED that amazing personality to want tp put up with me and my friday night streamings of various TV-shows (Torchwood this friday night I'm all set). Anyway, it's common knowledge that an amazing personality shines through. The way you see someone changes after how you feel about them. I learned that the hard way (it's a long story that I won't tell you). Beautiful on the inside=beautiful on the outside. Cheesey but very true. Now, back ro Torchwood.


Day 24

How attractive do you consider yourself?

God, this is awkward. This is not something I'm very comfortable talking about. I guess I like the way I look, most days I think I'm pretty. But I don't think I'd be attracted to myself if I was someone else, if you know what I mean. Or maybe I would. I have no idea. But I guess since personality is a part of what makes you attractive, I don't think I am very attractive to a lot of people, because I'm too odd and cold or shy. I'm not very talkative. Tyra Banks would probably say that I have no personality (if only she knew). I think it takes someone like me to want to be with me, in the long run. Or something. I think I've strayed a bit from the subject now. Suppose the short answer is that I don't consider myself very attractive, but I do think I look good. Which can be two very different things.


And she's got a rainbow syrup in her heart that she bleeds


Day 23

Are you a fan of art? If so, who is your favorite artist? What artistic movement do you prefer?

Picture nr 6 from untitled.

Well, since I consider myself an artist I'd probably say that I am indeed a fan of art. Not entierly sure what is meant by "artistic movement" as such, but the artform I prefer is fashion-spread inspired photography. My favourite artist is Tim Walker (google him). I think he is amazing and I would die to have the time and budget so I can take the sort of pictures that he does.