State of Dreaming


Long black hair

I'm seriously considering this. I'm gonna get my pink back for a while, then I want to get long and black. Probably no fringe though, just extensions. We'll see what happens. Maybe I'll end up with black hair and pink tips. It all depends in how much it will pain me to dye away my blonde hair. But truth to be told I'm a bit sick of it. I don't really like the combo of brown+yellowish blonde that I have now. Anywaaaaaaay. Have some photos to edit now. BYE.


You may be good looking, but you're not a piece of art

Fashion/make-up credits: Pic1: H&M Dress, sunglasses and tights, Ebay creepers. Pic2: Gina Trictot head piece and black transparent skirt, H&M dip dye top with long back and heels. Pic3: H&M sunglasses, phonecase and top, Cubus bikini top, Max Factor Ruby Tuesday red lipstick.

Think you’re funny, think you’re smart,
Think you’re gonna break my heart.
Think you’re funny, think you’re smart,
Yeah you may be good looking,
But you’re not a piece of art.

Power and Control - Marina & the Diamonds.



Two outfits from the past week that I haven't had the time to edit before now. I'm too lazy to write where everything's from, but most of it has been written in previous outfit posts anyway. If there's anything you're wondering about anyway, just ask! I don't beleive in bullshit like "I'm not writing where I buy my clothes because I don't want anyone to copy me". That's for people who think they're all something and are completely full of themselves. It's just seriously annoying.

As soon as my hair is dry from showering, I'm gonna take pictures of my new stuff for you!


Breakfast at H&M

I went to another event at H&M this morning. Breakfast shopping. Got two new pairs of sunglasses and these black heels. I'm totally in love with them. I'm gonna try and take some pictures of the other stuff I bought this weekend!


Fashion, put it all on me

Sorry I didn't update yesterday. I wanted to, but it was such a crazy long day. I was away from nine in the morning to ten in the evening. And between that there was meeting with my project-group from school, regular school, town with Lovisa, taekwondo practice and then crazy shopping event at H&M. When I came home I was so sleepy I didn't want to do anything. It was a good day, though. Anyway, I got hold of all the stuff I wanted from the new Fashion Against Aids collection. This black fringe dress for example. I'll post better pictures later! Gotta run now. Got another long day ahead of me.


Comment reply - Title

Nej, det är med helt vanlig html-kodning. I kodmallen, bland det första koderna som är, under <head> så finns där en där det står <title>någontextjagkommerinteihåg</title>. Den texten som jag inte kommer ihåg gör att ditt bloggnamn och bloggbeskriving kommer upp på fliken. Om du gör den ändring jag gjort så gör de inte det mer, bara så du vet. Mellan dessa <title> så tar man helt enkelt bort det som står, och skriver det man vill ska stå på fliken istället. I min kodmall står det t ex <title>MONS†ER YOU†H</title>.


How did you remove the hyphen from the tab above the adressfield in the browser? Do you use or something like that?

This is mainly for people who use the same blogging platform as me,, because they have a special code so you get this hyphen in the text on your tab, and this is how you remove it. But since it's a code that goes for all html-coding on all blogs, I'll tell you how you do it in English as well.

In the html-code of your blog/website there's a code, almost at the top, under <head> that says <title>sometextIdon'tknow</title>. What is written in between these two title tags is what it says on the tab, it's your blog/website's title, so to speak. You can write whatever you like there. In my coding it says <title>MONS†ER YOU†H</title>, for example.


Monki Girl

Today's outfit: Vintage jeans jacket, Monki knitted sweater, Gina tricot long tank top, Monki leggings, Ebay creepers, DIY scarf and necklaces from various places and DIY.

That I'm wearing leggings only means one thing: that I'm to fucking tired to put on anything else. I generally don't like wearing anything but tights, but some days you just need to be comfortable. Then it's jeans or leggings. I really would have preferred to stay in bed today, but you know how it is. I'm not even wearing any make-up. 

Anyway, got to go. Hope you all have a nice day or whatever.


River Island

I'm to lazy to edit high resolution photos of today's outfit so you're only getting one from my phone. It's not a very fancy outfit anyway. New socks from River Island, though. I love them. Got two other new pairs from there as well.

I found my dream school+course. Fashion Photography at London Collage of Fashion. Only one very very big problem. It's £9000 per year. And it's three years long. I wish things were different but I just don't have £27000, no matter how badly I want to go there. And it sucks. School should be free. You should get in on good grades and talent, not buy your way in. There's not even any point in applying because I just don't have that kind of money. My parents support me, but only to a certain limit. And I don't want to be in debt to them for the rest of my life, do I? Hm.

I'm gonna watch a comedy now and cry over this. Night.



I cried at the end of the last episode of Fringe. I kid you not, there were serious tears. I'm just SO EMOTIONAL ABOUT THESE CHARACTERS. And I have to say that the casting of Etta is brilliant, I love her.


Objects in Space

Today's outfit: New Look pink t-shirt, H&M bustier, H&M zipper skirt, DIY lace skirt, DIY head piece, Ebay eye necklace, other vintage necklaces, Ebay creepers.

It's so weird when I think back to when I was fifteen/sixteen, and all the shit me and my friends had to put up with because we dressed differently. I have been shy and awkward for almost as long as I can remember, very quiet and layed-back, but somehow I never doubted that it was worth it, to stand out in the way me and my friends did. We put up with lots of name calling and other crap. I just wanted to be myself, it didn't feel like too much to ask for, but for some people, apparently, it was. I know a lot of kids go through this, and all of you know how much it sucks to be different and having people looking down on you for it. I (and my friends) was strong enough to endure it, and I feel so sorry for you who are not. It's a shame you have to be strong to be yourself in the first place.

I have 611 fans on lookbook at this moment. It's not a lot compared to some others, but it's still over SIX HUNDRED people who like the way I dress. It's amazing. Some of my absolute style icons right now, have photos of me on their blogs/tumblrs. Recently I have been featured on various fashion websites and blogs. It all feels like a big FUCK YOU to all who ever bullied me for the way I dressed.

I always liked myself. I've never felt ashamed of any of my quirks and weirdnesses. This is who I am, who I've always been, and always will be. If anyone disaproves or whatever of that, then that's their bloody problem, not mine. I'm never going to change for anyone elses sake, and I don't dress the way I do for anyone but me. That's just the way it is.



Fashion credits: DIY hair piece, mixed jewelry, Only sheer dress, DIY dip dye shorts, vintage belt. Make-up credits: Mac Cyber lipstick.



Got these today. Bought them of Ebay. I'm so excited about them, and I love them very very much. The pink t-shirt is also new, from New Look. It was only £3, and I was getting a dress, so I ordered it as well. The colour is not all al right in these photos, but it's really lovely irl. I'm not sure if I'm gonna show you the lace dress or not. I'm gonna save it for my sister's graduation. It's seven weeks 'til then, so I know I'm very early, but I'm always like this, deciding what to wear months ahead. Anyhow, you'll see it then. It's not than special, but it's perfect for the occation.

Me and my sisters (and hopefully Malvina) are going to two H&M Fashion Against Aids events next week. One the night before they launch it, and one the day after in the morning. My youngest sister Lovisa, is super excited about the collection, and so am I. But esprecially her. She's gonna look great in it, I hope mum lets her buy stuff, haha!



I just came back from the post office. I was supposed to mail a letter and pick up a package, but naturally my mind was so occupied with what it might be in the package that I forgot to mail the letter. But no worries, it's not that much of a hurry.

I got lots of stuff in the mail today. I'll show you some of it later. Gonna get some food in me first. And please ignore the fight I'm having with my eyebrows. I am very angry with them right now.

I finished watching Firefly yesterday. A friend told me I was no proper nerd/geek unless I had watched it, and I don't want to ruin my reputation, do I? I'm not really all that fond of Joss Whedon's stuff. I mean, Buffy, Dollhouse and all is great, but it's nothing I obsess about, like X-Files, Fringe, Doctor Who etc. Same with Firefly (though it's definitly my favourite of his, definitly!). It has gotten me into this mood though, where I'm all about this grunge 90's/early 00's  sci-fi fashion thing. I mean, like how they're all like "Yay, we wear dirty and trashy clothes all the time because this is some sort of post apocalypse and we can't afford new ones, and we dye our hair in fancy colours!". Everyone is grunge hipsters in these kinds of shows and I LIKE IT.  Anyway, I'm gonna watch Serenity tonight and them I'm all done and I can resume to call myself a nerd with pride.



Worst make-up day ever. Ever. EVER. I re-painted my eyebrows over and over and it was just shit so I washed them of completely. And I really don't like having thin eyebrows. I went with eyeliner instead. And mascara. I hate mascara more than any other make up. Shouldn't have used mascara. I had to re-do the lipstick a few times as well. Probably had to re-do my foundation like five times. Make-up really isn't worth the bother. If I didn't hate my natural eyebrows so much I wouldn't bother with it at all.

There's a photo of me on goSupermodel. It has been taken of this blog or my lookbook without my permission and posted there without my permission, or me being credited. I don't know if it's by the site itself, or by a user. Either way, this is something I am not alright with. I don't mind being posted on tumblr or personal blogs without proper credit, because they might not know it's me. But being posted on a website, without as much as my name, is not alright. I am a photographer and I own my work. It's not alright for professional sites to use it without permission. Even if it's posted by a user, it's in a "magazine" that can seen by any user, not in a forum (which would have been more alright). I've sent an e-mail, requesting that they credit me. Because how am I supposed to make any money from my work if it's just stolen of the internet? And how am supposed to make money if I don't post it on the internet? Copyright is a bitch.

Update: They were very nice and understanding, and I really appreciate that. As I thought the picture was posted by a user, not the actual site. There's now a link to my blog, giving me credit, which is all I ask for. +++ to the staff of goSupermodel.

Everything on this blog is copyrighted to me, wherever else it may be posted as well. It says so in more than one place.


Dead man's bones

Today is going to be a long day. Probably won't blog tonight. I'm just gonna crawl up on the couch with Firefly and New Girl. Though I probably will blog anyway now, just because I said I wouldn't. It's always like that...

Since my fashion posts are my most appreciated ones, here's a photo of my latest DIY. A regular oversized white t-shirt, that you can find anywhere, that I have dyed, cut off the collar, sleaves and shortened, and then done this rib cage cut out in the back. It's really easy, just google rib cage or backbone for inspiration. It looks better irl, though. It's real hard to catch on photo, it always falls wrong.

I always end up doing loads of DIY on the weekends. It's the only time I've got time for it. I've got another pair of dip dyed shorts I've fixed up. I was originally supposed to sell them along with the others, but the shredding went a bit wrong so they were in no shape to be sold. I don't want to sell stuff in too bad quality. But they're still good enough quality for just me to wear. I'll show them to you next time I wear them.

And btw, the shorts for sale will be up on this blog for this week only, if you're interested in them. Then I will put them up on tradera (for pretty much the same prices). Just so you know.


FOR SALE: Shorts

American flag shorts:
Original brand: Lee
Type: Low cut
Waist: 75cm
Stretchy: A little
Price: 300SEK or highest bidder.
Special Note: Used once.

Black trashed shorts:
Original brand: Crocker
Type: Low cut
Waist: 81cm
Stretchy: Yes
Price: 300SEK or highest bidder.

Blue bleached pink dip dye shorts:
Original brand: Cheap monday
Type: Low cut
Waist: 77cm
Stretchy: Yes
Price: 300SEK or highest bidder.

Union Jack (with velvet/lace) shorts:
Original brand: Crocker
Type: Low cut
Waist: 81cm
Stretchy: Yes
Price: 500SEK or highest bidder.
Special Note: These are the shorts that are the largest in size.

Pastel pink yellow dip dye shorts:
Original brand: Cheap Monday
Type: Low cut
Waist: 85cm
Stretchy: No
Price: 250SEK or highest bidder.
Special Note: These have a very wide waist compared to the fit over hips and ass. You're probably gonna need a belt for them, even if they fit.

All Shorts are sizes 34-38. Model is 166cm tall and weighs about 50kg (it's not me). If you're wondering of they'll fit you, go on the waist messurements, whether or not they're stretchy and how they fit the model. It's possible to machine wash all shorts at 30°C.

Photos are unedited, so colours are about as accurate as they can get.

I ship only within Europe, and shipping costs will be added to the total price. They will vary, depending on your location. But if it's within Sweden, shipping will be 50SEK.

Leave a comment with contact information or send me an e-mail if you're interested in buying any of the shorts, or if you have any questions. And please, only serious buyers.

For Swedish readers: Shorts are all now available only at my Tradera.



Todays outfit: New Look jeans jacket, second hand dress, H&M skirt, vintage jewelry, sunglasses from souvenir shop in London, Fjällräven bag (kånken), Weekday boots.

I really like this dress. It's very Wednesday Addams, don't you think? Especially with the shirt underneath.

The "fixing up" of my hair has been put on hold for a while, since some of the steps didn't turn out as planned. But I'm getting things back in order. The very boring yellowish blonde is going, but in a different way than originally planned. You'll see. It's all gonna be fine.

This morning I found out that my family (and I) are going to Mallorca in August. It's my mum's birthday and she likes to run away for it, so there you go. Two weeks in sun. I was really surprised by the destination though, we very rarely go to tourist resorts. Actually, when I was on Tenerife this winter, was the first time I was on a charter trip since I was like three. My mum doesn't like Charter trips. But our Mallorca trip is not charter, of course. Not a chance in hell. But still I was surprised. It's gonna be fab, though. I can't wait for August.

From August and onwards is just gonna be great. First of all, I will have finished working for the summer. Then this trip to serious sunshine. Then it will only be about two weeks left until Born This Way Ball in Copenhagen, which I am hopefully going to. And school starts again, with the course "theatre production", which I've been longing for. Then I'm going to London for my 21th birthday (21 is one of my lucky numbers!) and Born This Way Ball again. Do you realise how awesome this is going to be? The greatest two months of my life!

Gonna watch 30 Rock and Ashes to Ashes now, cheerio!


Shot dead in the head

My face today. Purple shirt from H&M (studds are DIY), turquoise shirt from Monki and Gene Hunt shirt som I wish the colours of my hair would be like this in reality. Less brown/yellow and more black/white. They're gonna be, though.

So far today has been running so smoothly that it makes me even more nervous than I already was. I've only been up for about an hour, so there's really no need to get ahead of myself. But hopefully today will be a really good day. I'll tell you why, if everything indeed goes the way I hope it will. Sorry for being so cryptic, but I really don't want to jinx it, even though I'm pretty sure I already have... I'm really freaking out internally. I'm dead nervous, but in the good way. I'm gonna stop talking about it now, because what if it doesn't happen? I'm gonna be so disapointed. Oh, shut up already. Sorry. I'm gonna go now. Only 2h17min left. Talk to you later.


Sou, doko made mo maiagaru nara takaku. Shinjitenara sono saki mada maniau kara.

[That's right, if you're going to soar anywhere, go higher.
If you believe, then you can still make it to the other side in time.]


Malin to ashes

Re-watch time. Right then, let's do this. Come at me, bro (no, Hillevi, not you this time!). Btw, subtitles are for pansies.


Light me up

I don't think I can be anything other than me.



Fashion credits: DIY chain headpiece, DIY velvet+lace dress, vintage necklaces, Shock studded choker, Zara white fur jacket, Jeffrey Campbell velvet Tardy boots.

I take much pride in my dress designs and making. There's nothing better than an awesome dress that you made yourself. I'l try to take the time to take pictures where you can see it properly some day!

Still haven't fixed up my hair. I think I'm gonna wait another 1,5 weeks, because then it will be a month since I last dyed my roots, which I need to do before I can use my extensions properly (I need to colour my dark "roots" onto them as well, you see).

I've been thinking, and isn't it kinda funny how people take it upon themselves to label you, but the second you try and label yourself, people think you're full of it. And at the same time, if you don't label yourself, they don't know what to make of you. Everyone can go ahead and label me all they like, I know who I am, and I will probably never be who you think I am anyway. And I'm not saying that because I'm full of myself, but because it's true. Kisses.


That's why her memory disc is so big, it's full of secrets

I had a movie night with my youngest sister. She wanted to watch "Harry Potter and the baskilisk", so we ended up doing so (Yes, I know it's not called that, and that it's spelled basilisk). Then moved on to Mysteriet på Greveholm (translation: The Mystery of Greveholm), which in Sweden is well known as the best christmas calendar ever (it's from 1996).


Natsu no Koi wa Nijiiro ni Kagayaku

Todays outfit: New Look jeans jacket with pins from various places, home knitted scarf, H&M striped shirt, Gina Tricot see through skirt, New Yorker bag.

I taught my grandmother how to travel with the "new" (it's not new anymore, but you know how old people are) subway. She gave snacks and cookies for it, so I'm not complaining.

I've started watching Natsu no Koi wa Nijiiro ni Kagayaku (aka Summer Romance Shines in Rainbow Color)
. It's a fairly new drama starring MatsuJun. He's so cute that I just can't help myself! Gonna continue watching now, nighty night!




To be free

Step 1 out of 3 of the fixing up of my hair is done. It's long and blonde again. Though the blonde shade of my real hair and the extensions differ a bit (you can't tell because photoshop is my bff), but at stage 2 or 3 (I haven't decided upon in which order to preceed) that will hopefully be solved. I'm gonna wait a few days anyway, I'm on easter break (which for me means sleeping away half of the daytime, and then sitting on my ass in front of the computer way past midnight) anyway so it's no hurry. And I'm just gonna say before anyone comments: it's supposed to be chopped off straight at the tips, I made it that way on purpose, I don't just suck at cutting hair.

I'm listening to Arashi a lot, as you may have noticed. It's because I'm in love with Jun Matsumoto. And beacuse I like their music, but that's a given. I'd share some songs with you, but I can't find any of the ones I like on Youtube nad Arashi's not on Spotify at all. But if you like to check them out on your own I'm mostly listening to singles and the lastest album from '09. I'll list some of the songs I like. If it's a link it means it's on Youtube. Unfortunately the ones I like the most are not. Anyway, here they are (not in order):

1. One Love (from Hana Yori Dango Finale movie)
2. Believe
3. Truth
4. Crazy Moon (Kimi wa muteki)
5. Circus
6. Movin' On
7. Troublemaker
8. To Be Free (this one makes me cry, I don't even know why, it just does)
9. Refrain

They're all in Japanese, even though their titles might make you think otherwise.

Need to eat now, before I leave for taekwondo practice. Cheerio!


Kokoro wo daite

Today's outfit was pretty basic. This is practically what i put on when I don't know what else. And the photo is from before I had decided on which shoes to wear. I ended up with all black low converse. Anyway, jacket is from a shop in Paris, H&M white shirt, Gina tricot long tank top, Glitter bow tie (bow ties are cool), New Look bag and home knitted scarf.

Malvina and I went second hand shopping today. I found a black dress and a jumpsuit. You'll get to see them eventually. Then we went to Burger King and she taught me various way to have fun with the ice that's left in your cup when you've finished your drink. I don't even want to know how retarded we must have sounded to everyone around us...

Good news is that my new extensions have arrived so I'll be fixing up my hair soon! Hope it turnes out the way I want it too!

Title is from Movin' On by Arashi. I think kokoro (meaning heart) might be my favourte word of all. Right now anyways.

And I honestly don't know what's up with my face in photos these days. I hardly look like myself...



Today's outfit wasn't fancy enough to deserve it's own post, so you're just getting these webcam pics where I look weird. I wore this t-shirt form I've gotta do something about it though, because I love the print and all, but it just doesn't fit well. And a funny thing, the charm on one of the necklaces I'm wearing is actually a pressed penny that we made in Stratford-Upon-Avon, and it has Shakespeare on it! I'm proud that I've been to Stratford-Upon-Avon, and that I've seen Shakespears grave! I'm a huge fan of his, the tempest is my favourite play that I've seen in my hometown!

Today has been school, some hanging around wasting time with Malvina (per usual, these days), and then taekwondo practice. I wish there were some older kids in my group. I'm one of the oldest (if not THE oldest, right now), and it's kind of lame, when everyone else is like 14 to 18...

ANYWAY, food and Kimi Wa Petto awaits me. I have easter break now, so I can stay up aaaaall night! Cheerio!


Kimi Wa Petto

Forever love. Probably my favourite Japanese Drama of all.